The New Zealand general election was last Saturday, and the people have spoken.

What they had to say was muffled, incomprehensible and as confused as Donald Trump at a lesbian folk festival.

Comrades, this election has had it all.

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Gerrymandering the enrolment process, billionaires plotting to rig it, and gang-selfie hysteria.

It made it all feel less like a democratic process and more like a Netflix true crime series.

But it did show Kiwis have a sense of humour.

Paul Goldsmith, the Justice Minister who criminalised the homeless is now homeless.

Finance minister unemployed
Nicola Willis, the Finance Minister who made 5.7 percent of Kiwis unemployed is now unemployed.

And despite maybe winning, the National Party’s caretaker Prime Minister Christopher Luxon is weaker now than when he won in 2023.

ACT’s David Seymour and New Zealand First’s Winston Peters are the Quick Yellow and Silver Foxes jumping over that Lazy Blue Hog.

The tail wagging this dog is now longer than the dog.

It’s all tail, no dog.

Expect 3 times the crazy, and 5 times the social carnage if National, ACT and NZF become the majority after almost 400,000 specials are counted and the final result is announced on November 27.

What we can say is Te Pati Māori’s strategy was a success and the generational shape of Māori demographics have bypassed Labour for the Greens.

The people have spoken; we need to wait to understand what they have said.

Martyn Bradbury is editor-publisher of The Daily Blog, convenor of The Bradbury Group political panel, and writes a column for urban Māori Radio Waatea News. Republished with permission.